Last night I had one of those vivid dreams, live and in color. It was the kind of dream that one remembers the next day and I have been thinking about it since I awoke this morning. In this particular dream my dear wife, Jane, decided that we needed to separate, which is strange considering this isn’t even been a topic for us. Now, some smart folks believe that our dreams are a way for us to work out issues in our lives, some problem or puzzle that we are trying to solve. As I reflect on this dream it’s not so much about our separating as it is more about our need to find some time to be away, together. Since my accident, Jane has been basically on the go, between work and having to help me when at home. For those first couple of weeks I couldn’t get downstairs very well, get my own meals or even a drink. I needed her help to dress in the morning, get my breakfast and arrange to make my lunch all before she went off to work herself. Many of the chores I did before the crash, like walking our dog or taking out the trash, all fell on her shoulders. Our vacation plans were thrown out and we have spent the summer staying at home.
All of this has had its effect on us and this dream, I believe, is my own subconscious working out that we need to separate ourselves from our occupations and spend some quality time together, alone. One of the benefits from having to spend time in recuperation is to step back and look upon my life and my own marriage to gain some perspective. Sometimes in the midst of all the busyness and the pull of responsibilities, we tend to get a little off course. There are those who will tell me that sacrificing is part of my vocation but that doesn’t mean I am to sacrifice that which I hold dear. When all is said and done, when the dust settles and I enter those twilight years, it will be the times I have spent with Jane that will stand out and not all of the other things I have done.